On Friday my partner flew home to the Middle East, he's gone for three weeks. He hasn't been home for two years, so seeing family will be extra special this visit. In addition his grandmother passed away a few months ago, so this visit will be tinged with sadness.
I'm missing him already, in addition I have a toothache which I'm sure is going to result in an extraction.
The pain killers and the odd G&T are helping keep the discomfort at bay until I can get to the dentist on Monday.
From time to time I question the level of my love for my partner, I think this is more about self doubt than anything else. I had this conversation many years ago with a close family friend, almost my second mother. I told her I couldn't understand why someone would love me like a lover should.
She responded that I deserve that love and that anyone would be lucky to have me. That was nice for my ego, but it reinforced for me that I deserve all the love possible that comes from a relationship.
That my life has played out in such a way that I'm lucky enough to find a man to love and to be loved in return, means the world to me.
I'm at a point in my life where I feel I deserve that love and enjoy the ability to give that love.
So, with my partner away I remain here at home confident in the love I have for him and he for me.
