My Boyfriend, Christmas and the Family!

Hi everyone - it's late, a long day at work and for some reason I feel like blogging - nuts! But, I have some things to share. As Dan Savage says, "it really does get better".

This past Christmas, my partner and I went to spend Christmas with my mum, my sister and her family and my extended family. Mum and my partner have met a number of times before and they adore each other, that's awesome. It warms my heart that they're so close - it makes me a little nervous too :-)

However, it was the first time my sister, her husband the four kids and the extended family met him. I was a little nervous for him and also for myself. But, I had no reason to be, everyone was so cool. It was as though he'd been a part of the family forever. I was relieved and overjoyed.

Just this past week, I was on SKYPE with my 8 year old niece and she asked after my partner. "Is he there?" she said. No was the answer, we don't live together yet. She was adorable that she would think to ask after him. Ok, I'm a sap, I had a little tear in my eye.

At the end of next month we're moving into together. We found a fabulous brand new apartment just south of Sydney CBD (city) and we're very excited. I'm looking forward to building a home with the man I love. Corny perhaps, but I'm really excited.

Here I am, 39 years old and excited that I'm moving in with my boyfriend, my partner and my lover. He's never had a flat mate or room mate before, that may be a challenge in itself. But I can't wait. We want to do all the silly gay things you'd expect, decorate, coordinate, buy a King size bed, have matching towels etc etc.

So, if you're a teenager and your'e struggling with your sexuality. I promise you, it really does get better. You don't have to wait until you're 39 like me. As soon as I left high school it got better.

Please share your experiences with family meeting your partners so others can see that it doesn't have to be a nightmare experience.

Tyler Clementi

The news covers again the tragic loss of life of another gay teenager who chose to take his own life. At 18, he was a promising music student, his friends spoke highly of him, a great person. But where are we as a society that a young man chooses to take his life because people have found out that he's gay?

Then there's the kids that we never hear about, who quietly take their lives without the fanfare of global news coverage. How many gay teenagers have watched the news this week and seen Tyler's plight and the choice he made? I imagine there are many thousands. I worry that they see this as perhaps their only way out of the humiliation they feel, the bullying they suffer at school and the fear they have about sharing with their family and loved ones that they're gay.

One of my favourite online gay columnists, Dan Savage was horrified at this story as with any story of a gay person taking their life. So, he and his husband put together a YouTube Channel called It Gets Better. He's invited others to contribute and share their stories about high school, the bullying and coming out to parents. The general consensus being that life really does get better when you leave high school.

Of the news coverage I read, from the US, Australia and Canada some of the most enlightened comments from readers came from Salt Lake City, Utah. Comments like:


"tribtalksense says: One of the people in my office has a great saying posted it states, "Never take a person's dignity. It means everything to them and has no worth to you." - Frank Barrow.  This despicable act, (by those taping it), demonstrates this."

"nungwa says: Self-loathing is a bitter and cruel thing. The shame and embarrassment Tyler must have felt had to be excruciating."

If you know any young people who are struggling with their sexuality, take a moment to send them an email with a link to It Gets Better and maybe share you're own story with them.


Click here for Australia News Coverage

Click here for Canadian News Coverage